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Web Warriors: Assault on Neckbeard's Keep IC

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Post  Lapis-Lazily Mon Nov 25, 2013 11:19 pm

The party proceeds down the red tunnel, and then the purple tunnel in the next room. The purple tunnel goes on for quite a ways, heading ever deeper into the mine. At a certain point the lanterns give way to glowing blue crystals set into the walls. Any attempt to remove them proves impossible. Finally the group can see a lit chamber ahead. There is a weird sound coming from inside, something almost like... laughter.
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Post  Zarhon Mon Nov 25, 2013 11:29 pm

"Huh, these are kind of nifty. And it sounds like someone is in a 'good' mood out there. Or maybe its machinery or something. We've come this far...", Gus comments, trying to identify the "laughing".

Perception:
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Post  maswoon Tue Nov 26, 2013 12:35 am

"That's creepy." Sarah mutters, making sure to keep her voice low such that the laughing person cannot hear. She attempts to strike at the crystal with a Keyblade, summoned from her Namae no Nai, giving a low "hmmm" when it bears no result. "Maybe someone who knows things about things could say what this is and if it's relevant at all...?"

Perceeeeive:
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Post  Copper Rose Tue Nov 26, 2013 12:47 am

Thalia immediately starts looking for something that could correspond to the last part of the code (up, down, pull, or down, up, push).


Last edited by Copper Rose on Tue Nov 26, 2013 12:47 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post  Linear Analysis Tue Nov 26, 2013 12:42 pm

Jonny gives things a cursory once over, more worried about Thalia's decision to poke ahead.

Meta-Perc:

He does wince a bit at Sarah's crystal whacking... but at least it doesn't seem like they're connected to anything.

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Post  Lapis-Lazily Tue Nov 26, 2013 6:40 pm

Inside the room ahead Thalia sees a nerdy looking young man holding what looks like a comic book. The room itself is a huge cave area lit by the glowing crystals seen in the tunnels leading up to it. In the very back is a large wall made of intense fire. The nerdy guy is sitting on a chair near the middle reading the comic and laughing. As Thalia pokes her head in he looks up at her and gives a slight shocked glance before standing up. He pushes his glasses up on his nose before speaking in a nasally voice. "Well hello there. Wasn't expecting you to be awake already. Why don't you and your friends come in and take a seat."

Suddenly Thalia, and everyone else is pulled into the room and put on chairs that come up from the ground. A large metal cage door clatters down behind them.
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Post  Draco12387 Tue Nov 26, 2013 6:43 pm

DerouX stands up from the chair. "What's going on? Who are you?"
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Post  Lapis-Lazily Tue Nov 26, 2013 6:53 pm

"I am xX_CoMiXl0v3R360B4tm4N_Xx, and I am one of Neckbeard's generals. I am tasked with opening this vault down here to get precious user information from this Facebook server. I already got what I came for, but when I saw your group was coming, I figured I'd set a little trap for you, Riddler style. Of course you all took the bait, albeit very slowly. Seriously, you n00bs suck at puzzles. If Batman were here, he'd have solved it in seconds. Sadly, none of you are Batman. Anyway, time to see if I'll just kill yo now, or give you a fighting chance, he cackles, pulling a two-faced coin with one side scarred by fire. He flips it into the air and catches it, revealing the unscarred side. "Ah, goody. I get to have some fun with you all. Gentlemen, have you ever met a troll?

Suddenly a large stomping sound can be heard coming from a side cave. A grate opens, and in walks a humongous ugly beast, with a very familiar face. The grate closes behind it. "Lol, n00bs. u all bout to get smashed. Hitler did nothing wrong!"

"And just to be fair, I left you guys a little gift beyond my the firewall, if you can finish my puzzle. It'll really help to get that, but grabbing it is purely optional. I'll just watch this from above. Have fun."
The nerdy guy suddenly grows a large pair of bat-like wings and flies to the ceiling of the cave laughing.
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Post  maswoon Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:06 pm

"Uh. Hey. How you doin'," Sarah says, jarred. At the appearance of the troll, she panicks and backs up, knocking over the chair she's sitting in. "He-hey, I dunno if this is entirely appropriate!" she shouts, hand on the Namae No Nai with intent to press the red button, but she overshoots a little and ends up hitting the green one...

d100 time:

...and a brief flash emits from the sheath, causing everyone to blink once, a new eye color emerging. Sarah blinks again a few times. "Fortunately that seemed to do nothing..." she mutters, her fingers poised to press whatever button needs to be pressed.


Last edited by maswoon on Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post  Copper Rose Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:20 pm

"Idiots." Thalia pulls all the light in the room into her book, runs over to a corner and yells, "Hey, big guy! Operation Chanology failed!" She closes her eyes and releases the light in a blinding flash, then opens them again and tries to use the enraged(?) troll to launch her to the ceiling.
Meta:
Thalia now has sky blue eyes, for some reason.
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Post  Lapis-Lazily Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:22 pm

Thlia manages to launch herself into the air towards the nerdy guy.
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Post  kajisora Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:31 pm

As soon as the light fades, Kaji starts uncoiling her grappling hook from her belt and runs towards where she remembered the troll being.
A small pop sounds, and the wire attached becomes coated in a sticky liquid, as she loops it around the troll's ankles and pulls it tight.

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Post  Copper Rose Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:36 pm

Thalia, screaming bloody murder, tries to grab the nerd guy and pull him down to the ground.
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Post  Zarhon Tue Nov 26, 2013 7:59 pm

"Hey, don't just run off, you uncultured little cretin! Stop!", Gus yells at the bat-winged nerd, wagging his finger threateningly, a scene that, coupled with his newly-pink eyes, fails to gets the message across. Much to his surprise, a stream of weird-looking... stuff exits his finger, straight for the nerd, impacting his clothing. His clothes then become equally... glitchy? "Huh, that... That worked? Weird. Is that supposed to happen when I say stop?", Gus exclaims, prompting another instance of the glitch-beam, this one flying around erratically, before impacting the silken rope coiled around the troll. "Guess it does. Well, I ain't going near that thing. Let's see if we can open that gate...", he mutters, quickly flying his recliner over to the gate. "No lever or anything. Damn traps!", he rants, kicking the gate. Once again to his surprise, the glitchy effect exits from his shoe, and engulfs the gate, leaving it looking rather feeble.

Stuff:


Last edited by Zarhon on Tue Nov 26, 2013 9:04 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post  maswoon Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:02 pm

Springing to action, Sarah aids Kaji with the rope shenanigans. This is totally just like Shingeki no Kyojin oh my goooosh

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Last edited by maswoon on Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:03 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : code fail)
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Post  Draco12387 Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:48 pm

DerouX takes a small metal disk from inside his jacket, tossing it onto the ground underneath the bat-geek. It expands into a mechanical device that lies flat on the ground, ready to be activated. Unfortunately, it seems to be just slightly glitched, and won't be able to run unless someone makes a minor tweak.

Meta:

Also, DerouX's eyes have turned pink for 10 days.
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Post  Lapis-Lazily Tue Nov 26, 2013 9:32 pm

It all happens in a blur. The troll suddenly falls, a look of surprise upon its normally smiley face. The laughing nerd gets tackled in the air by Thalia. Unable to move, the combined weight of the two shatters the immovable shirt causing a weird glitch that allows the two people to fall to the ground. Thalia lands squarely on the nerd, practically just a little bruised. The nerd looks less fortunate and lets out a groan as he lapses into unconsciousness. Meanwhile, the troll tries to get up but finds its feet immovable for the moment. It let's out an odd laugh. "Lol, u nerd can't beet my lazah!" it yells as a blue light begins shining in its open mouth.
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Post  Copper Rose Tue Nov 26, 2013 9:43 pm

"Well shit." Thalia puts her hand against the nerd's grossly naked back, then pulls it away to admire her work. "In case you wake up and try to run away. Freak."
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Post  AProcrastinatingWriter Tue Nov 26, 2013 11:55 pm

"Alright, time for some action! Everyone get behind me!" Woolie cries, revealing himself (and his shining techno-suit from the 2030s) in a vermillion blaze of glory as he runs up directly in front of the troll. "Well, you know, if we're on the internet, and you're about to fire a lazer...then I guess I have no choice! I must succumb to the force of the memes, however loath I may be to do so!" Despite this apparent (And quite melodramatic) hesitation, Woolie is clearly smiling as he flexes his arms, pumping his fsts into the air. "I'M THE JUGGERNAUT, BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-"

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Post  Draco12387 Wed Nov 27, 2013 1:24 am

DerouX facepalms at Woolie's actions, grimacing as he makes a mirror appear in front of Woolie's chest to hopefully shield some of the damage. "No, you dumbass, you don't tank the skillshots, you dodge them! Why the fuck am I playing support anyways!" He complains.

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Post  Lapis-Lazily Wed Nov 27, 2013 1:36 am

The lazah continues to charge.
Spoiler:
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Post  Copper Rose Wed Nov 27, 2013 2:02 am

Thalia, seeing that the troll's Lazer is about to go off, decides to drag the nerd guy over to the troll before running to a far corner.
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Post  maswoon Wed Nov 27, 2013 2:05 am

"Huh? Well, alright... Stand back, everyone!" Sarah shouts, conjuring a keyblade with a push of the white button, jamming her fist down on the edge of the sheathed weapon, wincing in pain, though she knows the blood is vital for what was to come next.



This triggers a transformation in Senketsu, one which turns it...

Well, much sluttier, for starters. Only, she didn't fill it out NEARLY as much as Ryuko, but hey, it still fit alright. The uniform has transformed into the clothing equivalent of a whorish Gundam mobile suit. "KAMUI, SENKETSU!" she cries, flushed. Charging the troll with the force of 10,000 High School Principals and a little more, she crashes her entire body into the Troll's face and points it towards Neckbeard's general. If this is like a game... then I don't have to feel bad about this, right? ...Try to ignore the fact that everyone's staring at your butt too.

Athletics /flex:


Last edited by maswoon on Sun Dec 01, 2013 1:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post  Copper Rose Wed Nov 27, 2013 2:53 am

Thalia looks at Sarah. "That... No. Ew. Are you sure you're a freshman?"
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Post  Linear Analysis Wed Nov 27, 2013 3:18 am

Laughter. Chair. Fire. General. Sky Blue Eyes for 8 days. Troll. Chaos.

Really? Really? Really.

And then... Less Clothes. More mayhem. Ropes and flying and falling and Lazers? Jonny's confusion just builds up.

"What the HECK guys! Don't feed the trolls! They get more powerful the more attention they get!"

And Sarah really needs to not be wearing that outfit.

Jonny blushes.

NOT THAT WAY YOU IDIOT.

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