The Wizard's Request

"I said 'if', my good sir," Banana reminded him. "Why would I ask for a lawyer if I didn't plan to use one? I may be chaotic, but I'm not wasteful."

[18 Perception; 8 rolled, 10 Perception]

[Sorry, not enough to pick up what he mumbled.]

"Oh," Cross said, a slightly ashamed look on his face. "I was under the impression that was if whatever escape attempt you had didn't pan out."

[Oh well.]

"This is my escape attempt, should I need it," Banana said. "Unless it isn't, in which case it isn't."

[The bar might be removed at great effort, though it would likely make a loud noise... Unless it's carefully worked over several days to slide out easily.]

"Well, ye got yer lawyer." Came the bark, "Good luck with him. Hope ye can afford em."

A trilling sound came from outside the door. When the door clanged open a gorgeous red and gold phoenix soared into the room, perching on Red Cross' head.

[Hahaha!]

Banana took this in stride. "Mr. Wright, I presume? I am Banana Nut Sundae, and my associate is Red Cross. Incidentally, I realize that we can't really stop you, but I doubt Mr. Cross appreciates his head being used as a perch."

[23 Persuasion if necessary; 8 rolled, 15 Persuasion]

The phoenix trills again, spreading its wings as one claw snatched up a quill - writing on a piece of parchment it brought in.

Yes, quite pleased to meet you as well. I hear you have requested my services?

Normally at this point Cross would get a little irked, but this time he was too starstruck to even consider getting mad. He mentioned to Banana, "It's ok, I don't mind."

Turning his attention towards their attorney, Cross explained. "Yes, we are. We've been accused of the murder of Calcifer Sunspire. While we did die as a result of our actions, it was self defense. See, I, and presumably my acquaintance here, got a letter asking us at 7 PM sharp, and that he wished to ask a favor of us. Banana and I met for the first time, as we both got there a little early. We met Calcifer at the entrance, where he proceeded to lead us to the top of his spire. He seemed friendly enough, though in retrospect he seemed apprehensive. We inquired what the favor was, and I don't think I'll ever forget anything he said after that. He said, 'I need you to die', before we were bathed in flame."

Pausing for a moment to catch his breath and calm himself, Cross began describing the fight: "I managed to act first. I got a retaliatory strike off and provided some emergency aid to the two of us, something I ended up doing a lot of. It was a good thing, too, as immediately afterwards he wreathed me in flame. It was put out quickly, but the burns were severe. The fighting beyond that was kind of a blur, though I do remember working through the pain in order to get Calcifer to calm down for a minute or so. See, I'm a nurse, and for some reason I've always been good at calming down the patients when necessary. Anyways, when I asked why he was attacking us, he said 'I have no choice... You are in prophecy', and that 'You will burn... now... Or.. many more...' He then looked at his drawer, and started attacking us again. The adrenaline means that the actual fighting was a bit of a blur, but I remember trying to keep both her and myself in working condition, myself nicking Calcifer with a scalpel, a blast of energy from Banana hitting Calcifer, the color resembling Nightmare Night candy, Calcifer smashing this white crystal that appeared to have rejuvenating qualities, and Calcifer knocking Banana unconscious with an explosion." With a sharp breath and a long exhale, Cross warned Phoenix "You might want to brace yourself for the next part. It's kind of crazy."

A deep breath, and Cross continued. "I had just gotten Banana back up on her hooves with some smelling salts. Suddenly this prismatic energy emitted from her, the room looking not unlike a kaleidoscope. This is the crazy party, but suddenly balloons moving at incredible speeds came from nowhere, literally from nowhere, and hit Calcifer. He was sent flying into a bookshelf behind him, one that was particularly laden with objects. Banana was able to lift the shelf off of him. His last words are just as haunting as his declaration of intent; he said 'Can't... You... Must... Need to... Stop... Kill... You... Must... Die...' Crushed, bleeding, and dying, he still had our death first and foremost in his mind.

"After that, I opened his desk drawer, as he kept looking at that, especially when mentioning this 'prophecy'. Unfortunately, I was unable to read it at all, and handed it to Banana as I examined red crystals that were similar to the white one Calcifer used. Admittedly, I figured that if the two guards outside the spire were private, and possibly in on his plan to murder us, it'd be nice to have something to hold them off. A brief examination revealed them as fire-gems, but their power was being suppressed by their owner. His death meant their power was unleashed, and set the entire spire ablaze. Moving to exit, the building itself began to collapse. Our retreat was almost immediately halted by animated suits of armor, which we passed on our way up; them having been behind wards at that time. Similarly, there were the magical beasts on a lower floor that we could hear were loose. I tried getting some healing medicine from a Zebra Shaman jar, but I dropped it in my panic, mildly lacerating my legs. Thankfully for me, Banana had the smart idea of using some nearby tapestries to escape. She grabbed me and jumped out, but lost her grip. The last thing I remember was the fall.

"So yes, that's our story. I don't think I missed anything, but I'm sure Banana will correct me if I have. But yeah, there are no witnesses to our story, the other party in this is dead, and he's an important figure while we're just two ponies.We've both heard that you're one of, if not THE best for hopeless cases, and this certainly seems hopeless, which is why we asked for you. There's not much to corroborate our story. There is the letter he sent me, which I had in my bag, and the scroll I mentioned, which I'm pretty sure Banana stuck in her saddlebags. At least, I hope so, or that's probably ash by now. I think that's it, but it feels as if though I'm forgetting something..."

As Cross' head gradually lowered, it suddenly jerked back up as he exclaimed "OH! Right, now I remember! That scroll with the symbols on it also had our pictures on it, in a different color of ink."

"I got the scroll," Banana assured him. "Not that it does any good. The guards probably took my bags. But... yeah, I'd say you summed things up pretty well. I certainly don't remember exactly what he said. 'Blahblahblah prophecy you die now blahblahblah', that's all I remember."

The phoenix cocks its head, studying you with one of its brilliantly bright eyes. Then its claw scribbled out another sentence on the paper.

Perhaps such scroll can be subpoenaed for evidence. I might be able to look into it. However, there is the matter of my price…

"Name it," Banana replied immediately, "and we'll see if it's something we can pay."

My usual rate is ten thousand bits. The crimson bird scrawled on the page. But I can give you a 50% reduction. I like hopeless cases. They sometimes give me a challenge.

With a pondering look on his face, and with a tinge of worry in his tone, Cross said "That... might be a problem. I personally have about 500 bits immediately available, and about 1500 bits spread around a hoofful of bank accounts. I don't know about Banana, though. Is it possible to take out a loan while we're in jail?"

"From a bank? Prob'ly not. Private loan? Depends on the guy, I bet," Banana theorized. "I only have like 1000 bits, none of which I can get at the moment. 13 of them were in my bag, but the rest are scattered across Canterlot in various safe houses." She sighed. "I hate to suggest this, but could we maybe work off whatever debt we incur in your service? I'm sure you can find something we can do..."

[Oh, ouch. Nat 1 Persuasion. Dang it!]

The phoenix let out a caw of something like laughter. It was some time before he bubbled down enough to scribble a response.

That sounds quite agreeable. Under what inflated interest would you be willing to pa for such a delayed transaction?

Banana hesitated. She had never really known much about money, considering it such a necessary evil that she only knew the basic "give somepony money to get stuff" portions of finance. "Um... do me a favor, please, Cross, and make the decision, because I really have no desire to put my hoof in my mouth and name something way too high."

"That... might be a problem. I'm afraid I'm not exactly an economist, myself. Perhaps there is something else we could do, such as retrieving something of importance that you desire?"

The red and gold plumed bird let out a little chatter of amusement. The quill scratched over the parchment.

You don’t exactly seem like the most competent murderers to get caught, but I do like being owed tremendous favors. Yes… There IS something I could use some help with. If you’ll agree to do one task for me, no questions asked, I’ll take your case.

Banana grinned, relieved. "'No questions asked' is my new middle name. Thank you, Mr. Wright." It didn't even occur to her that Red Cross might refuse

With a strange look on his face, a mix of annoyance and relief at the same time, Cross responded. "We're not murderers, we did not go in there intending to kill him, let alone escape. If we had, I would have been wearing fireproof equipment, for starters. Anyways, before I agree, I just wish to clarify: this will waive the entire fee in exchange for this unspecified favor, correct?"

But of course. The bird scribbled, a twinkle in its eyes.

Nodding, Cross said "Then we have a deal."

Banana nodded as well. "Now that we've settled that, care to join us for dinner, Mr. Wright? We have musty air, dirty stone, and my mane."

Stairc -Dan Felder wrote:Most excellent. Most excellent indeed. Well then... I have to ask you, what incriminating or embarrassing activities have you committed in the past? I have a hunch they'll be cropping up in trial.

"I serve Discord," Banana said bluntly. "I wouldn't be surprised if they moved for immediate execution in my case."

Stairc -Dan Felder wrote:Most excellent. Most excellent indeed. Well then... I have to ask you, what incriminating or embarrassing activities have you committed in the past? I have a hunch they'll be cropping up in trial.

Looking up and to the left, Red Cross thought for a few minutes before responding. "Honestly? There were a couple deaths on the job, where I was the first to respond but unable to save the patient, though the subsequent investigation cleared me of any wrongdoing. Beyond that, I've played a couple good-natured pranks on some friends. Nothing major, just stuff like switching the shampoo out for hair dye. I don't leave an exciting life, and I was really hoping it'd STAY that way."