Re: The "OUT OF CONTEXT" game quotes.

Xel Unknown Sat Jul 20, 2013 10:28 pm

"I was having "HAPPY-GO-FUN-TIMES" at that Whore House..."

"So we're playing with the "Frank Miller" of GMs..."

- Shadow Walkers

Cainx13 Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:33 pm

“It can resist the effect”
“so if we skin it can we get the resistence?”
“no, it’s part of the biology.”
“so if we bathe in it’s guts can we get the effect?”
“no”

“There is a spot under it’s tail to stun it for a bit.”
“so we poke it’s ass to stun it?”

“the door looks it like it’s mythril”
“so it’s worth money”
“If you can move it”
“So we break the wall and haul the door out.”

“OOC: So Twinkies will survive a nuke”

You just got burned on that idea

‘he’s a bad ass’
*pause*
‘didn’t mean that pun’

‘trauma conga line time’

‘it’s pretty much the orgasm of combat.’

-T3

Z2 Fri Jul 26, 2013 9:27 pm

Z2 wrote:Hmm, for the sake of covering all our bases - we should perform this operation immersed in vodka, with my life story written on me, in a monastery, surrounded by cheerleaders.

Break their armor, cut them up, grate parts of them into smoothies to heal, push them off the cliff, drop a rock on them, and spit on their souls.

You're getting a pimp coat and liking it.

If our attention spans are this short, consider how unwise it is to extend the amount of time we have to keep you near us.

Won't you make a woman out of me?

1. The party was messing with a dark magic ritual that required the target to be 'immersed in spirit', this was the plan to capture such an odd requirement.

2. This is the response to the combat encounter we DIDN'T like.

3. One party member using 'shape reality' to craft some clothes, the other party member suggesting a different style mid-casting, this was the first member's response.

4. The party was attempting to interrogate a villain, but kept getting distracted by nonsense; this line was one player's attempt to work the incompetence into the intimidation.

5. Female identifying character with the 'Mechanical' trait was messing with a naive allied wizard - planning to trade out the trait. The double entendre was 100% necessary.

Z2 Fri Jul 26, 2013 9:28 pm

WELCOME... TO THE TOWER OF MEMES.

The monster has changed from the Numa Numa Dance to Gangnam Style, be afraid.

**Paper Shadow** Fri Jul 26, 2013 10:10 pm

Paper Shadow wrote:"I did not sign up for an elf liberation adventure."
- A Different D&D game...

I was in a campaign where everyone was kobolds. Sadly, we weren't very good at being kobolds so we just ran into things head first (literally for one character). We killed some goblins while we looked for a new home and they had an elf prisoner. Opinions were torn over what to do, my character not really caring and just wanted to get to the mission at hand. This was one of the players' comment. They ended up getting a ring or something from the elf when we let her go. I later got a ring from the Drow. Sadly the DM vanished before these rings did anything...

---
'We, the Princess of the Night, would like a place for us to relax, up in the north, but not north enough that I reach Caneighda, that place sucks.' - Princess Luna, 1300 years ago.
---
'So, things are good in Luna's Retreat. Business is picking up. Lots of custom dolls. I accidentally a daughter. Lots of new friends.'
---
Do I roll endurance for not crying?
- Slice of Night

Whiteeyes Wed Jul 31, 2013 11:55 am

"Taste my adequacy velocity!"

"I can't hear him over the uranium."

"I love having built in transition music."

"Right now she's teaching a troll "What is love", but is leaving out the "baby don't hurt me" part."

"Wait a minute, should we really be checking the most dangerous area of the place first?"
"Of course, the important stuff in secret abandoned labs are always past the most dangerous area where things have gone terribly wrong and all the dangerous stuff is."
"No, we're being smart about this Galaxy, we're checking the other areas first."

"So you're pre-loading the chair for looting?"
"Yeah, I'm not dragging it through the dungeon."

"What, it's a nice stapler!"

"You find a book titled Kleptomania for Dummies."
"Not sure if should steal?"
"Yoink!"
"Damn it Galaxy!"

- Shadowrun

Z2 Sat Aug 03, 2013 4:25 pm

Maybe he has a parthenogenesis laser?

Xel Unknown Sat Aug 03, 2013 4:49 pm

"Worst cast, you aren't totally in control of yourself... Best case, you are now somehow pregnant."

- Lunaris Civitas

Whiteeyes Mon Aug 05, 2013 12:40 pm

"How many side quests are we on right now?"

"It's a cat; it's a horribly vicious killing machine."

"The tiny heathen that worships the meddlers is right."

"Your plan actually succeeds. It is apparently so stupid that the Grimlocks can't think of anyone stupid enough to try it."

- 4E

Doc pseudopolis Mon Aug 05, 2013 12:44 pm

War of the Assassins wrote:
"Are we taking the van?"
"No, I don't think we need it."
"Welp, I'm flying off. Later bitchesssss! I'm gonna get there first"
"Crap, everyone, in the van!"

"They're offering a sale on the four major food-groups: Salt, starch, Sugar and Burnt Brown Crunchy Bits."

"I want two orders of crunchy bits an order of grease and an order of bacon. With a side salad and a diet coke cause I'm watching my figure"

"I want a half a wooden door and a human foot."
"I'm sorry ma'am we're all out of foot."

"I want a big ass bowl of mosquitos you know those really big ones"

"I'm cutting down on blood. You got any fruit?"
*The waitress takes the fruit bowl from the counter a puts it one your table, the fruit is made of plastic.*

"Is there gum under the tables?"
"You should be worried if there isn't any."

"Now I see why you needed that diet coke, fatty."

"You see the bust of Betty White, with the legs of a mutant sticking out of her mouth."
"What"
"...is exactly what everypony is thinking."

"some asshole knocked over the chocolate fountain"

"What about the jacuzzi?"
"It appears to be fine, apart from a dead mutant's remains. It appears to have been electrocuted."
"YES! I knew it would come in handy!"

"I check to see if he's ok"
*Gunshot

*You have to deal with Caring Soul's Staring*
I stare back
eye twitch
*Ear flick*
*Start mumbling latin prayers under my breath, don't break eye contact
*Keep staring, roll opposing persuasion*
*Rolls a 24 and is beaten by a 25*
*You blink.*
*I blink incessantly*
"Go and bother those you came in with."
"Do you believe in heaven?"
*Feh*
"Celestia's light shines even on those too far down to feel its warmth."
*in the chat*
"Wow hearing that from you"
"I'm full of surprises this weekend"

"Don't touch my scythe."
*Almost immediately*
"I touch the scythe."
*Later*
"I touch the scythe*
"I hold him back from touching the scythe."

"The Ranking system is just...unsavory you know?"
"That's What I've Been Saying!"

"I roll laughter *9*"
"You recieve an eldritch artefact...and by eldritch I mean oblong, it's quite useless expect for a doorstop or a paperweight or something."
"I give it to chips to play with."
*Slightly later*
"Congratulations, you managed to find the one use for an otherwise completely useless artifact."

**Stairc -Dan Felder** Mon Aug 12, 2013 2:10 am

"Don't panic."
"Don't panic?!? It's a dragon that breathes NAZIS."

Dusk Raven Mon Aug 12, 2013 3:36 pm

From an out of character conversation: "Is it okay if we sacrifice your character?"

Z2 Wed Aug 21, 2013 9:12 pm

"I just feel a deep sense of wrongness from there being a form of power we aren't using..."

**Lapis-Lazily** Wed Aug 21, 2013 10:25 pm

"... and I will seduce the cultist!"

-One of my DnD campaigns

Mind Gamer Wed Aug 21, 2013 10:28 pm

"Congratulations. You've created Cultist Chili."
"I collect the chili!"

-One of the 4e D&D games I DMed

**Lapis-Lazily** Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:39 am

"You guys look suspiscious."
"I think you look suspicious."
"I do look suspicious! I better go turn myself in."

Living Legends game.

Zarhon Thu Aug 22, 2013 6:53 pm

"I hate that cat." (Multiple times)

"There's a chance they might spare your lives!"
"Everyone: HAHAHAHAHAH"

"So, how many windows can we shove/throw this guy through?"
"Oh, about six or seven?"

"Stop pissing yourself!"

"He appears to be rummaging under a shelf, trying to recover his detached hand."
"Hey, guy! You look like you need a hand!"

"I search inside the display."
*Rolls atheltics*
"Except for the few boxes you move to get inside the display, you manage to search without knocking it over. Maybe you should apologize to the staff member who was stacking it though."

"What rhymes with 'painsaw'?
"Gain law. Why?"

"So I have to CMC to dip dive and dodge around the two guards, but once I do everyone else can just walk by them? Ok."
"As much as you don't want it to, your CMC helps us as well."

"Isn't he a minor?"

"Did you use protection?"

"I think I stopped you guys from commiting wanton murder about three times so far."
"Stopping me from going into a hospital doesn't count."

"Hey, I'm just telling you not to do it. I'm not going to actually stop you."
"Oh? That is fantastic news to hear."

"back in my day-"
"We get it, you're old!"

"Apparently, this is a very terrifying completely average pony."

"So, I did the waffles, Daydream poured the milk, Axe did the flambe. That leaves you, Copious.
"I say grace."

- War of the Assassins

**Lapis-Lazily** Fri Aug 23, 2013 2:56 am

"Even with protection, it's still pretty difficult to navigate through there."

"The emperor's butt is mostly definitely a 10/10, why do you think he's emperor?"

"Super drunk medical fun!

"Oh, so someone reads your mind and you assume the mindflayer did it?"
"Did you?"
"No comment."

"I'm going to start a timer now until this guy dies."

-Space Fantasy Living Legends campaign.

Z2 Sat Aug 31, 2013 5:31 pm

Do I need to climb up this staircase butt first?

Z2 Sun Sep 01, 2013 5:20 am

Z2 wrote:Can't we just talk about this civilly over a horn-polishing session?

Hey! I've got a boat to pick with you!

"GASP! THE BEAUTIFUL AND DIGNIFIED PAIGE CANNOT BE GETTING ACNE!"

"Aww, I wanted to keep the Felis Crustulum as a pet."

"Good luck cross-referencing my face. I've had it less than 24 hours."

"Maybe if we make giant supermutant pegasi ourselves the city can be saved that way?"

All from Lunaris Civitas:
1. The party had wandered into a town of aggressive unicorn supremacists. Upon being ambushed, one of the players nervously tried this one when the baddies were demanding a strip search (the character also had wings, you see.)

2. Later in that same town, the party had ridden a gondola to the villains main base. While deciding how to enter the area, the athletic player had this one-liner... and threw the boat into the wall, MAKING an entrance.

3. A laughter effect required Paige to speak in the third person with two adjectives uttered every time she spoke. That particular line was uttered when an array of sniper rifles were trained on her.

4. ANOTHER laughter effect summoned a nyan cat to fly around. We mainly saw it fly around and give us a rainbow background and theme music for our boss fight (incidentally persuading the DM to give it my stats for Earthbound's Giygas.) After the battle, one character wished to take it with them, only for it to turn into an ordinary pastry. Felis Crustulum was decided to be the scientific name for the nyan cat.

5. Soul transplants, transformations, dimension hopping... I don't want to get into too much about this campaign. That one's mostly self-explanatory, excepting the tidbit that it was the villain trying to identify who they captured.

6. The villains were planning to destroy Cloudsdale with a dirty bomb. It was suggested that ponies' innate magic might interfere and cause some city members to survive as GIANT SUPERMUTANT PEGASI. After destroying the bomb, this supposition came back with a much more difficult to foil plot; remembering the supposition from earlier, one player suggested this. (The party consisted of a really, REALLY competent mad scientist, a particularly zealous [about Cloudsdale] necromancer, and Paige; so giant supermutant pegasi would not be an impossible thing for the group to send out.)

Z2 Thu Sep 05, 2013 9:24 pm

If nothing else just breathe through your butt.

We'll split the difference, it's a pinup of Twilight as Sephiroth.

If you were wondering, the idea was for you to use [character] as a parachute.

NO I'M NOT, I'M THIS MANHOLE COVER.

Z2 Sat Sep 07, 2013 6:07 pm

You scream in pain for 30 minutes...
Those are some impressive lungs.

CURE YOURSELF OF CONSCIOUSNESS

SparkImpulse Sat Sep 07, 2013 6:43 pm

So, my quote was the result of an endurance check. I'd placed the players in a Florida-like setting: high heat, high humidity, they weren't completely ready for it.

So, the player with Flame-On! explained that his character thought she'd endure the heat better if she was on fire, so she triggered her utility.

The local farmers were quite concerned about this sight, and threw about 20 gallons of water on her before they figured out it was magic, and otherwise under control.

Whiteeyes Sun Sep 08, 2013 10:01 pm

"If anybody needs me I'll be in my room plotting my own downfall."

"I'm magically delicious. Eat me!"

"Only a fool would think an evil lawyer from Hell would betray you. And I'm no fool."

**Stairc -Dan Felder** Wed Sep 11, 2013 2:17 am

[10:15:14 PM] Chad Weeks: WHY YOU WANNA DO ROMANCE SUBPLOT WITH LITTLE GIRLS CARSON.
[10:15:31 PM] Kindulas: SHUT UP CHAD SHE'S AS OLD AS I AM ;-;

Sponsored content